“It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.” In this quote, Marcus Aurelius, a famous philosopher, describes how life can be scary, but it will never be scarier than choosing to not fully live. Life has always been a little bit uncertain and fragile—like looking out onto a vast open area not being able to see the end just a few steps ahead. It can feel scary to have so much uncertainty and choices to make. There’s no outline or map you can use to navigate the twists and turns of life. The world will force you to make decisions and choices: simple and complex. Some of these choices won’t feel comfortable or be as simple as choosing red or blue for your cake’s frosting, but these are what shape you as a person and determine the course of your life.
Each decision you’re faced with no matter how small becomes a page in your continuing story. Whether these decisions are choosing a college to study at or deciding if you’re ready to be a parent, these choices shape you and continue your story. It’s ordinary to want answers and a clear path but life doesn’t offer that. Instead it gives you long winding turns and large hills that you have to find a way through and over. It’s these long sidequests and detours that build resilience, strength, courage and who you are.
Some days I find myself thinking about how long the road ahead is, how impossible it feels to make it to the end. Who knows if you’re heading in the right direction or are prepared for a storm coming your way. In your life there are so many people to meet, choices to make and opportunities to try. Thinking about this is sometimes overwhelming and can be scary when you think about the future. For some people it feels like it would be easier to disappear and avoid the future but that’s not usually an option. But when you feel this uncertain fear about the future, there’s also that lingering feeling of excitement about what comes next!
This excitement pushes you to reach goals and take risks even when you can’t see ahead of you. You have to embrace the twists, turns and uncertainty that your path holds, allowing you to step out of your comfort zone and chase your dreams. Life isn’t about racing to the finish line as fast as possible but taking your time and collecting memories and experiences along the way. The fine balance between fear and excitement is what makes life meaningful and exhilarating.
It is exciting to think about all the accomplishments you haven’t had, the people you’ll get to meet and the connections and feelings that are yet to come. The future is wide open and it’s your decision on how to shape it and what to make with it. There will be hundreds of little moments in your life full of laughter, tears and friendship that are exciting and scary to look forward to. I think part of growing up is making mistakes and taking wrong turns on your path and having to backtrack.
There will be hundreds of bumps along the way and it will feel easier to take a way around but going over these bumps is what helps us build character and strength. Every step forward is a step in the right direction and brings you closer to new exciting events.
Even though the road seems never ending and overwhelming, remember that life is about staying open and curious to new ideas and experiences while staying firm to your beliefs and building your character based on old and new values you’ve found on your journey. It’s okay to only be able to see a couple steps ahead and not the whole path because sometimes the best moments are the ones that aren’t planned.
The road ahead may feel very long and daunting when you think about it, but it’s worth it for all the little choices and moments that will shape you. The most important part is continuing to take baby steps down the scary path of life because somewhere along the way you are going to find something worth holding onto.
